Pema Chodron

Quotes on Aging and Mortality Related Issues Dr. Irvin D. Yalom - Staring at the Sun




Writing on the Subject of:	Writing on the Subject of:
On the many varieties of anxiety about death : Many of us call mingle anxiety about death with the fear of evil, abandonment, or annihilation. Others are staggered by the enormity of eternity, of being dead forever and ever and ever and ever; others are unable to grasp the state of nonbeing and ponder the question of where they will be when they are dead; others focus on the horror of their entire personal world vanishing; others wrestle with the issue of death's inevitability…	Correlation between an unlived life and our fear of death: "All the things I would not have done," points to a theme of great importance to many who ponder or face death: the positive correlation between the fear of death and the sense of unlived life. In other words, the more I unlived your life, the greater your death anxiety. The more you fail to experience your life fully, the more you will fear death.
No activity can satisfy our hunger for eternal life: The frightening thought of inevitable death, Epicurus insisted, interferes with our enjoyment of life and leaves no pleasure undisturbed. Because no activity can satisfy our craving for eternal life, all activities are intrinsically unrewarding. He wrote that many individuals can develop a hatred of life -- even, ironically, to the point of suicide; others engaged in frenetic and aimless activity that has no point other than the avoidance of the pain inherent in the human condition.	Obcessive ways we try to master death: It is part of Epicurus's genius to have anticipated the contemporary view of the unconscious: he emphasized that death concerns are not conscious to most individuals but must be inferred by disguised manifestations: for example, excessive religiosity, an all-consuming accumulation of wealth, and blind grasping for power and honors, all of which offer a counterfeit version of immortality.
Religons often encourage our fear of death: Epicurus was vehement in his condemnation of contemporary religious leaders who, in an effort to increase their own power, increased the death anxiety of their followers by warning of the punishments that would be measured out after death to those who failed to heed particular rules and regulations.	On the loss of self due to fear: Who among us has not known someone (including, perhaps, ourselves), so outwardly directed, so concerned about accumulating possessions or about what others think, as to lose all sense of self? Such a person, when posed a question, searches outward rather than inward for the answer; that is, he or she scans the faces of others to divine, which answer they desire or expect.